“Intermarriage? It’s a way to connect more people”

Reform Rabbi Rick Jacobs, President of the Union for Reform Judaism, believes that the negative image of the Reform movement in Israel is incorrect. He believes there is no doubt that Jerusalem is the capital of Israel. He wants Israelis to learn that there are streams beyond Orthodoxy for whom liberalism is part of the Jewish teachings but refuses to answer if he officiates intermarriages.

Zvika Klein

Translation from Hebrew: Avi Woolf

One of the fascinating facts about the life story of the Union for Reform Judaism’s President, Reform Rabbi Rick Jacobs (62), is that he volunteered at the religious Zionist kibbutz of Sdeh Eliyahu in his youth. “I was on vacation from my studies at Hebrew University,” he remembered with a smile, “They wanted me on the kibbutz because of my height, so that I join their basketball team which wasn’t all that goof. It doesn’t matter that I wasn’t all that good a player, it was a positive experience. I spend six weeks there, including Pesach. Everything was entirely kosher, but I think spirit was lacking there.”

“Spirit” is one of the words Jacobs uses a great deal throughout much of his career, which reached its peak when he became the leader of the largest Jewish denomination in the US. He presently lives in New Rochelle, New York. He received ordination as a Reform Rabbi in 1982 and was appointed head of the Brooklyn Heights community. He then served as the Rabbi of a synagogue in Scarsdale in Westchester County for 20 years. Already at the beginning of his career he sought to bring about changes in how people prayed in Reform communities, due to his sense that there was not enough spirit there.

“As a person who grew up in the US at the end of the 1960s and early 1970s, synagogue did not speak to me or my friends,” he recalled, “I grew up in a family which joined a Conservative synagogue, and then we replaced it with a Reform one, but this institution did not attract us. On the other hand, at the Jewish summer camps we attended every year we were full of inspiration at the prayers, the kabalat Shabbat, and the song. I told myself: We need to revive the synagogue or bring back looking into spirituality to the community. I also sought to introduce the subject of social justice to the synagogue.”

One of the changes which Jacobs led was new composing for all of traditional prayer. He joined up with musician Debby Friedman, whom he calls a “synagogue rebel,” and helped her create tunes for prayer which would be pleasant to the modern ear. “Together we also led healing ceremonies meant for people going through hard times like disease or treating relatives with illness. The ceremony is composed of songs, prayers, the reading of poetry and the sharing of the experiences everyone goes through. There is no formula for such a prayer, so we were creative. We combined music and creativity, but we also saw to developing an openness to Jewish tradition, which was rejected by some in out movement in the years before.”

At the beginning of his path as a synagogue Rabbi, Jacobs supported the trend of readopting traditional elements. His community accepted the Sha’arei Tfilah siddue (published in 1976) which included more sections in Hebrew and blessings which were erased by the Reform movement in the past.

“Why reject tradition? It’s an amazing thing. In previous generations they thought that there is no need for tradition, whether it’s tallit, tefillin, or a kipa – they gave up on it. I tried to bring back many of those traditions. Jacobs himself wears a big knitted kipa, and if you see him on the street you might easily mistake him for a religious Zionist Jew.

A Sense of Betrayal

As of today, the Reform movement is the largest Jewish denomination in the US. According to the Pew Study, 35% of American Jews are Reform, 18% are Conservative, 10% are Orthodox, 30% are unaffiliated, and 6% belong to smaller denominations. According to estimates, the number of Reform Jews stands at two million.

Let’s talk a bit about one of the hottest issues where you are at the forefront: The Kotel compromise. To a certain extent this scandal has caused more Israelis to get to know who you are. After all, for some of these people the word Reform was a curse word…

“Once it was a kind of curse word here in the country, but today it’s not a curse but a blessing. A few years ago we represented an Israeli woman named Rosie Davidian who wanted to say kaddish for her deceased father and the Religious Council wouldn’t allow it. She said afterwards that ‘Thank God there are Reform Jews.’”

On the Kotel compromise he started by saying: “The compromise was born in that Prime Minister Netanyahu said that the fact that there is a ruckus every month regarding the protests of the Women of the Wall is a very bad story for the Jewish People. Why do we need the same story every month? The Prime Minister turned to then-Jewish Agency Chairman Nathan Sharansky to lead the process and an amazing process took place over the years. Avihai Mendelblit, then the Government Secretary, was very committed to the subject, and this is not obvious given the black kipa he wears. The Prime Minister gave full faith in the discussions, and sometimes even took part in them himself.” As we know, after the government approved the compromise, it was suspended, and then shelved in the format proposed.

“On the day the compromise was suspended I landed in Israel for an event involving the trustees of the Jewish Agency. From the moment I landed, my phone would not stop getting messages about the freeze. I went straight to the Jerusalem hotel where the Jewish Agency event took place, which brought Jewish leaders together from around the world. My sense was that this was not a matter with Reform and Conservative Jews but with the Jewish People. We were supposed to meet with the Prime Minister for a dinner in the Knesset the day after, and we all felt that we can’t meet with him in the reality that existed.”

According to him, “There is a sense of betrayal throughout the US. There was a commitment towards us which disappeared. After all, the issue is not just the establishment of an egalitarian prayer space at the Kotel but far beyond this. This was a declaration which recognizes our existence, of diaspora Jewry, for the first time. We have no desire to harm the Orthodox or the Haredim. At first we really sought to establish a third prayer area, next to the men’s and women’s prayer area, in the square we recognize today. But we understood that this will not work and offend the feelings of the Haredim. Imagine if our female Hazan led a prayer with there being a men’s prayer on the other side of the mehitzah. We therefore compromised and agreed on another area, next to Robinson’s Arch, where we could form policy with others.

“After we agree on this, they come and suspend the compromise? It’s a sense of alienation. This is undoubtedly a turning point in relations between Israel and world Jewry. The State of Israel is pushing out non-Orthodox Jews while we are turning inward; for us it is not a disengagement from Israel, but a moment we can use for greater involvement. This does not of course mean that there are no disputes.”

Influencing From the Inside

You are talking about this not being a “disengagement” but there was a lot of talk about American Jews no longer donating to Israel in the wake of the cancellation of the deal. Nathan Sharansky himself said that he expects a decline in donations as a result.

“We said out loud that ‘Lo Zu Haderekh,’” Jacobs answered in Hebrew. “I said at our conference taking place once every two years in the US, to 6,000 people at the central sermon on Saturday morning, that we need to invest more in Israel. I said that we don’t need to work only on issues like conversion and the Kotel but also other issues like freedom of marriage. After all, Israel is the only country on earth where a Jew can’t marry as they wish.”

But at the same event you speak of, you published a statement condemning American President Donald Trump for deciding to transfer the American embassy to Jerusalem without a diplomatic agreement. This fact led to a very large firestorm in Israel.

“We had a few statements about Jerusalem, one very old, from decades ago, when the movement declared that the American embassy needs to be in Jerusalem and that it is the Israeli capital. The statement in question was a day before the declaration of the President, and we issued a slightly different statement after he had spoken out on the subject. We must not forget that we saluted the President for his commitment to Israel.”

But you probably understand the response to your opposition. After all, both the right and the left in Israel welcomed the moving of the embassy.

“I understand that many Israelis understood from our words that we are against the move of the embassy, that we are against a statement made by a world power. But it’s not true. That’s not what we meant.”

Jacobs went on to say that “The day of the moving of the embassy was a hard day,” in reference to the violent protests on the Gaza border, where many Palestinians were killed. “I was not at the event of the opening of the embassy. I was not invited; I was not even close to getting an invitation.”

Did other Reform Rabbis receive an invitation?

“I don’t know. There was one Conservative who took part. I didn’t have the privilege.”

If they invited you, would you participate?

“Probably yes. I wasn’t happy about all the speakers there, such as the Dallas Baptist preacher Robert Jeffries. To embrace such people is a problematic thing. But on the other hand, the moving of the embassy is cause for celebration. The world needs to recognize that Jerusalem has been our capital for 3,000 years. Unquestionably. Period. I have nothing to add.”

Jacobs then added to this. He told of how in the movement’s summer camps there are now some 400 shlichim from Israel in cooperation with the Jewish Agency. “I always observe Israelis at the beginning and end of the summer from the side. In many cases they come to prayer, see a woman with a guitar and a tallit, maybe a woman putting on tefillin, and ask themselves what they are doing here. By the last Shabbat they feel positive about this. At the end of the summer they already say ‘What will we do when we go back? I came here to bring Israel to North America and suddenly we discovered our Judaism.”

A Politics of Moral Justice

Despite the leftwing stance Jacobs adopts vis-à-vis Israel, there are Jewish bodies in the country who think he isn’t critical enough of the Jewish State. The fringe group IfNotNow, which encourages teaching of the evils of Israeli “occupation” and “apartheid” in Jewish schools, initiated a petition against Jacobs in an attempt to get hm to let their people into the movement’s summer camps. “Our education in all the institutions is ours, and we are not willing to accept it from any other source,” Jacobs responded to the arguments. “We will not take ready made programs from the pro-Israel AIPAC lobby on the one hand, but also not from J Street on the other. We have a deep connection to Israel. We make people fall in love with Israel despite and sometimes because of the challenges, and in the wake of the positive things which happen in the country.

“Our movement supports the two states for two peoples solution. Did I invent that? Not at all. This is the policy of the Democratic Party and even the Republican Party for decades, and also of the state of Israel until recently. Are we afraid of talking about the occupation? No. After all, Ariel Sharon spoke of the occupation, and he said that there is a demographic time bomb which will lead us to lose Israel as a Jewish or democratic state. And I don’t want to lose either of those two values.”

Why do you need to take a political stance? To be against the settlement project, for instance? After all, you are a political denomination, not a political movement.

“A few weeks ago I led a protest, a kind of Bible study session, in front of the American Justice Department, after they separated between migrant children and their parents at the border. In the Bible, leaders like Isaiah, Amos, and others had a very clear vision of moral justice. We need to air a moral voice on the big questions. You can disagree with this, after all not everyone in our movement gas the same position, but we cannot allow ourselves not to deal with the matter. Is it sometimes controversial? Sure. But there are a lot of things which create controversy, and we have respect for other views. Elu v-Elu is a dispute for heaven’s sake. Why can’t we have a deep conversation here or in the US? Why if you are not radically pro-Israel then you’re defined as anti-Israel? It’s a disaster.”

Have you visited Judea and Samaria?

“Sure. And I want all our members to get acquainted with Israeli society in the most varied manner possible. I would meet with the Chief Rabbi if he would meet with me. For me the members of our synagogues should meet with as many Israelis as possible, it’s what will make them fall in love.”

Jacobs was one of the Jewish leaders who pressured the Conference of Presidents, the umbrella organization for central Jewish groups in the US, to accept the leftwing lobby J Street into the ranks of the organization. The group had tried to join a number of times and the members didn’t agree to accept them. Jacobs himself was part of the lobby’s rabbinical board, and he thinks they should be allowed to part of the American-Jewish mainstream and discourse. “They are being demonized. After all Friends of Peace Now are members of the Conference, so why not J Street? If you see what happens on American campuses in the US, the people leading the fight against the boycott movement on Israel, BDS, are members of the J Street student organization.”

But this is a lobby which promoted the decision of previous President Barack Obama to sign the nuclear deal with Iran, which was opposed by all Zionist parties, right and left. How can you call them pro-Israel?

“First of all, we as an organization chose not to take a stance on the agreement. Second, J Street activists represent a large group of pro-Israel activists, pro-peace agreement, who need to be part of the discourse. Why is it possible to bring in radical right groups to the Conference and not them?”

Welcoming Mixed Marriages

Jacobs tells of how he came as part of an annual delegation to Israel last February, and was even the one who invited Deputy Foreign Minister Tzipi Hotovely to say a few words. Hotovely had drawn fire from the American Jewish community when she had said a few months previously that American Jews “live comfortably” and “don’t fight.” She also said that “These people have no interest in going to the Kotel, they also don’t know what it’s like to be attacked with rockets.” Jacobs claims that “Her opinions about American Jewry demonstrate enormous ignorance.”

When I ask what he thinks of what she said, he responded that “I think she proved that she is not even on first grade level when it comes to understanding North American Jewry. There are many Israelis who simply don’t know us, and don’t understand. I meet with a lot of such delegations which we call ‘Reverse Birthright’ today. We bring Israeli MKs to the US and when I offer them to come to prayer Friday night, they sometimes tell me ‘No, it’s not for me.’ But when they come and see 1,000 people they don’t understand how this can be. Some connect, others not, but they say ‘There’s something here.’”

All the studies conducted in recent years show that there are fewer and fewer Reform Jews the lower the age group. You have lower birth rates than the average American, in addition to assimilation, and perhaps also the fact that the younger generation doesn’t exactly want to define itself as part of any movement, but as individualists. Demography is not on your side.

“According to the 2013 Pew survey, 35% of American Jews defined themselves as Reform Jews. That’s some two million Jews, and that’s not a small number at all. You are correct that our challenge if with the young. After all, joining a synagogue is just one way to express your Judaism. We offer other ways in which you can be an involved Jew without visiting a synagogue. From an internal poll we conducted, we learned that 4 out of 5 youths in our youth movements and summer camps are connected to Jewish communities in adulthood. Intermarriage is part of our life. After all they never loved us and certainly did not want to marry us; today there is no longer a stigma like in the past. This is an opportunity for us to connect more people. Minister Yariv Levin said that all the Reform Jews are assimilating and will disappear within a few years. I responded that we do stand at the door to Jewish life, but not on the way out but in. We found in that study we conducted that children from mixed families send their children to camps and synagogue at almost identical levels as families with a Jewish mother and father.”

So there is no problem with intermarriage?

“First of all, it’s our daily reality here in the US, but we can turn it from a curse into a blessing. My predecessor on the job said not to drive away mixed couples. The head of the Boston Federation, an Orthodox Jew himself, said that we need to put out a welcome mat to all those mixed families.”

Do you yourself officiate at intermarriages?

“Why does it matter what I do?”

It matters.

“I have a very solid opinion on the matter, but it really doesn’t make a difference if I officiate at such weddings or not.”

You are after all a community Rabbi, and you have certainly had to deal with the phenomenon. Not as president of the movement but as a local Rabbi.

“Our movement allows Rabbis to make a personal decision on the matter. Rabbis who don’t officiate at mixed marriages will also find a way to bring them closer.”

So you don’t want to answer.

“I want to clarify that Reform Rabbis conduct these weddings and even those who don’t do so from an informed perspective, they are led by a desire to bring people close. That same Rabbi can also bring people close in another way. Some of those couples are our Rabbis of chazans, some are presidents of synagogues. We have 140 such synagogue presidents, and they tell of their journey to Judaism. It’s important not to just look at surveys but also reality on the ground.”

Your Rabbis keep kashrut?

“Most Rabbis have a way in which they make the ‘sacred eating’ part of their Judaism. If they are vegetarians for instance they have an approach to this, and they may say a blessing before eating. Rav Kook said that this is the highest level of kashrut. We personally keep kashrut in the home, but it’s also very important for us to primarily bring healthy things home.”

Between Liberalism and Judaism

A few months ago, the Los Angeles branch of Hebrew Union College, the central institution of study for Reform Judaism, celebrated the ordination of male and female Reform Rabbis. The keynote speaker was American Jewish author Michael Chabon, who is known for his fierce criticism of the State of Israel. He criticized the “occupation” of Judea and Samaria, the Jewish settlement of Hebron, and the separation fence. Chabon wondered if the fence was set up for security reasons or to maintain the occupation. In addition, he expressed support for intermarriage and opposed Jewish calls to marry Jews. He also added that the story of the Exodus is “fabricated.”

Statements such as these and the fact that it took place during the Rabbinic ordination ceremony of the Reform movement led to a real firestorm among both American and Israeli Jewry. “It’s amazing how it is seen differently in Israel and the US,” Jacobs responded, clarifying that HUC is not his responsibility but that they are parallel organizations. “Liberals have no problem hearing him, whether they agree with him or not. Another evening not too long ago had a known philanthropist from the radical right speak and no-one raised an eyebrow.”

Do you agree with Chabon?

“I don’t agree with a lot of what he said, but the fact that he spoke there is not problematic in my eyes. It was clear that there would be a lively discussion of what he said. All our programs stress our support for Israel. I am willing to conduct a dialogue with people from across the spectrum. For instance, would I be willing to have a public discussion with Education and Diaspora Minister Naftali Bennet? Happily. Because it’s a debate for the sake of heaven.”

What do you think of Bennet?

“I respect him very much, and I particularly appreciate his deep understanding of diaspora Jewry and the programs he advances at the Diaspora Ministry. He economically supports a Reform movement program.”

I have personally known Jacobs for almost a decade, and I am in regular contact with him and his movement. I share how it’s been very hard for me to accept the Reform movement in the past year, after events like the Chabon speech, the attitude towards the moving of the embassy, and other matters.

I feel that your liberalism has gone beyond Judaism. As a journalist who has called on Israelis for years to accept you and learn from you, I felt I also need to criticize you for your conduct.

“This is a narrative which was created in Israel but which is not true. You probably don’t remember that at the end of Obama’s term as President the UN passed a resolution against the settlements and Obama, contrary to all other times, did not use America’s veto. You probably don’t remember that I criticized the President and told him that the UN is not a place which was ever fair to the State of Israel, and that he needed to use his veto right.”

To finish off, what can we learn from each other?

“We in the US can learn from the State of Israel how to live together, Jews from all backgrounds and ethnicities. It’s a blessing. Israel has to conduct negotiations every day regarding the question of how to live together in such a diverse society. Israelis can learn from us that if you neutralize the Orthodox political power, you will see that there are denominations which respect one another, which cause less hatred. We very much respect Orthodox communities in the US and Canada, but the connection to Judaism is not only through the question of whether a restaurant is kosher or not, if society keeps kosher or not. We did not add the issue of social justice to Judaism as liberal Jews, it’s part of the tradition.”

What message would you like to send our readers?

“I am a Rabbi who loves the Jewish People – all of them, including those I don’t agree with. I want those who read Makor Rishon or any other Israeli paper to know that we are a Zionist movement. Our executive recognized the Jerusalem Program of the World Zionist Organization. This is a program which speaks of Aliyah, learning about Israel, studying the Hebrew language, and more.”

Is there or isn’t there a crisis between Israel and American Jewry?

“It depends on us. On the leadership. There are all sorts of things the Israeli government is doing to drive us away. But the story is that we will not disappear, but come closer. We will criticize the policy on the one hand, but love the country and the values it was build on. We want to use the crisis to come closer, and that’s what we’ll do.”